It's not always what i say that sometimes seem to make things go more smoothly it's the words i choose not to say. In our day to day lives i try really hard to keep anything that might be confrontational with Master to myself, it's an unbelievable challenge to balance confrontation and sharing an opinion that i think He may want to hear. Master says that i am emotionless, last night He claimed that i addressed Him as an office manager when in fact, i couldn't for the life of me recall what i said to Him or how i said it. Now as i sit here i can't figure out what i said. The challenge of being completely obedient, following the exact rules at the exact moments and not become robotic is a conversation Master and i have had many times and it's something that i struggle with.
The claim that i'm emotionless is always hurtful though. i laugh so much with Master and my family and friends and i cry when i'm sad, i get upset or angry when things irritate me, i become frustrated... i DO have issues with letting go and breaking down walls. i have serious issues but emotionless isn't fair. i'm just throwing this out there into never never land into the world of the unknown, i'm just writing this to be writing it. At this point i think i need to start journaling with the idea that i'm writing to just get things out. The original reason i started writing. There are a lot of things that i needed to write about and then the journal became bland and a place where i wrote about a lot of nothing.
The other morning Master had just gotten up and He was getting a package together to ship and i made up a song, most times i do it to make Him laugh and this one i had practiced before He got up. i thought that if i started out the day right it would be a really good day. i waited until He was up for a few minutes, He had been up for about 10 minutes or so before i started my song. He was actually irritated this time when normally my songs are something that make His day. i wasn't really upset about it, it was just bad timing, i should have known better. The reason that i am even thinking about it is because of the comment He made last night. i forgot about the song until He mentioned that i was emotionless again last night. Emotionless people, people who have no life left in them, don't make up songs and try to enjoy life like that, as far as i would think. All i'm saying is that i know i have a long way to go in my journey to break down my walls but i do try.
Trying to live a life as a good slave, where is the line? When do we speak up and when is it considered arguing? After eight years i still haven't figured out when to shut up. Most of the time i choose to say nothing, it's safer but when i'm asked for my opinion, how far do we go?
These are things i struggle with every day and i know this post is a jumbled mess lol.
Peace to you and yours.
MD's treasure
Biz Page
On Being A "Professional" Master/slave
We've never, ever wanted to be mistaken for any of the countless people who claim to be a Master or slave when in reality, they just pretend for money. There's potentially a fine line in other folks' perception, and I've gone to considerable effort to never cross that line. My treasure writes here because she enjoys it, she loves to get and reply to comments and she also does it because I require it. In the beginning, it was a blog, nothing more, nothing less. In the last few years, it has become not only a blog, but also a hub for all of our online activity. Some of that activity is done simply for fun, some of it is to feed some sort of narcissistic need for kudos that I still deny having, and some of it is done to try to supplement our income by sharing our real life with others who might be willing to toss a few bucks our way for a small window into our normal activities. Normal for us but mere fantasies to them, things that they can't get at home or simply things that get their blood flowing south. Like most people, we started out never showing our faces, never being specific about where we live, blah blah blah. One day, I decided that I was tired of acting like I was ashamed of Myself or My girl, just so someone I knew wouldn't find a photo that would make them all butt hurt because of their own insecurities and closed-mindedness. In a very short time, we had started making videos and posting non-anonymous pictures all over the place. Eventually, My girl started doing live cam sessions for cash and it's become a multifaceted "business". That's why we're making this page. I didn't want it on the front page of the blog because this is still her blog, and always will be, but we wanted to add a page for some of the money-making things that we do.
About two years ago, we decided to test the waters with Kindle publishing. For a nominal fee of 99 cents a month, you can get this blog automatically delivered to your Kindle. Unfortunately, this makes it less likely for My girl to get the comments that she so loves, so if you decide to go the Kindle route, please come back here later to leave that comment you were thinking about!
Lately, we've had gentlemen ask if it was possible to buy My treasure's worn stockings. If worn stockings is what you seek, then we are happy to oblige. We've charged very reasonable amounts in the past, and that won't change. Pricing will depend entirely on quantity, color, availability, your location and any other variables or requests. We get her stockings from Europe, and we only order a few times a year, so we may have limited color options at any given time. If you're interested in My girl's worn stockings, or any other requests for that matter, please email her directly at precioustreasure_md@yahoo.com. We've done custom videos and would also be happy to do custom photosets. If it turns you on, and you think we can provide it, please don't hesitate to ask.
About 2 and a half years ago, we also decided to start making videos for sale. We've had a banner on the front page, but we've never really promoted it at all. Well, I'm not really going to promote it too much here either, but if you'd like to check out our clips, you can find them here. You can also find some of them here.
My treasure has also started working as a cam girl on ImLive. There's a banner on the front for this as well, but you can also click here or on the banner below to find her over there or schedule a meeting with her.
Banners here also!
I am listening ;-)
ReplyDeleteHey hun! Finding that happy medium is something all of us do. Its not easy and Im not sure if it will get easier with time. I doubt it..:) So know you are not alone in this ok
ReplyDeletebe good
starla
*hugs* Thanks Starla... i think that finding a happy medium gets more confusing sometimes is all. i just need to focus on finding balance, with many things. Thank you for always popping in here, it's great to know you're out there still checking in! =)
ReplyDelete